I have a hard time accomplishing a healthy relationship with Sunday.
Saturday, I love thee. Thou art fair and long and work free the next day.
Sunday? Not so much.
Sunday promises Monday.
Monday promises squirmy sassy students and deadlines calling for mountains of paperwork that I only get 1 checkmark for. "CHECK! TCWH is abiding by all bullshit rules and regulations. She causes no trouble, she does not rock the boat." Why do I get the feeling that someone will appear at my mobile classroom, erm...trailer one day and tell me that resistance is futile?
Dh is off on Sundays, meaning that we have more time to worry about all the stuff that we don't have time to do during the week because we are both working ALL THE DAMN TIME. I get panic attacks just thinking about it. Laundry, shopping, lesson plans, dishes, cleaning, paying bills - those all go smoothly WHEN YOU CAN CHIP AWAY AT THEM EVERY DAY. But when they all get crammed into one Sunday? Not so much. Any attempt at an actual marriage after all this other stuff is well, laughable. You would think that I would feel a little less angry after banging out some cardio today, wouldn't you? Well, I don't.
At a limp attempt to enhealthen ourselves, we joined a gym today. I hope we have time to go some time. Besides Saturdays and Sundays.
Dh thinks that I don't want him to have a "fun job", but that's really not the point. What it comes down to is that I just feel left out. I don't think I have EVER come home and said, "HEY! Today was a BLAST!" I don't. Teaching is not. It's hard work that makes me think sometimes that I'd rather be gutting fish with chopsticks for a penny per pound of guts in 100 degree heat while wearing all black with only beef jerky to eat and no water in sight.
He has a good time every day. And guess what? Those good times are all without me. I'm not saying that he can't have a good time without me. I'm just saying that I would enjoy it if he had a good time with me, too. With me working every day, and him working every night, the good fun times are OH....ummm....NEVER. Instead we're both just tired and frustrated and where does that get taken out since we have no outside interaction with anyone else? Each other. I don't think I've cried this much since I was about 2. AND I HATE CRYING! I realize that the all caps followed by the exclamation point makes me look like I'm stamping my foot and pouting, but I'm really yelling.
I hate feeling so angry so much.
And I hate feeling so unhappily married so much.
So Sunday, you're the target of my general discontent. Go away.
I know exactly how you feel. When we first moved here, Andy was working at the space center, and I had a really tough and stressful job as an aircraft mechanic that I had to commute to an hour each way on second shift, so I didn't even leave to go home until after midnight. They treated me like shit and I hated it something awful. I would cry when it was time to go to work. Things didn't get better until I finally got a job at the space center as well.
Things did get better then. It was all completely job related stress and we have no problem now, so I would say that you are in the wrong job, and that is what makes you upset with Dh. When I was in a bad job, I would get pissed at Andy because he wasn't.
My only advice is to find a new job, as I think that is what is poisoning your relationship. Good luck.
I know how you feel on some level. Hubby does work hard but he still ends up doing more fun stuff in his day at work than I do and - ahem he works harder.
He gets long lunch breaks, gets to go eat with friends and socialize. I work from home and it's sucks to be rather blunt. Some understand, some don't....
It just feels like my "jobs" never end. Sometimes I do wish I was him going to a regular old job 8-10 hours a day. He's helpful but I don't just get "my day off". He doesn't get it.
I get the kids off to school, do the house and the cooking, homework etc etc. Pay the bills, run my business while they are all sleeping, run errands etc etc etc. Yea, I think I would rather be him.
Kind of off topic, yet kinda not ;) It will work out babe. Maybe, just maybe you should consider a new career path, nothing wrong with that!