I have to wonder about 8th grade boys, sometimes. What planet they come from, I mean. I would type the "f" word in there, but I'm at school, so I am in Chaste Mode . The opposite of my trash talking s*&t slinging self. Holy cow I cannot believe I just censored myself twice in under a minute!
There is one boy here. SO disrespectful. Last year he asked me if I had DSL. For all you non computer geeks out there, it stands for d*ck sucking lips. Nice, hunh? Did I tell y'all that already, I'm sure I did. But this CHILD swore up and down that he had no idea what it meant. Unh hunh sure. Yesterday, he's running down the hall like his ass caught fire, and I stand right in front of him until he stops. I didn't say a word, but just stood there, made my point and then kept on my way. You know that feeling you get when someone is doing something behind your back? I got it. I turned around, and his MOTHERFUCKER is dry humping my back. I whirled around, he stops mid hump and says, "Sorry!" before scurrying off. Dumbass. I know you and your momma. What the hell makes kids think that it is right to act this way? I know my momma would have paddled me until I was in pain just thinking about sitting down.
There's another kid. Dressed head to toe in light pink. Pink socks. Pink shoelaces. And pink jersey. Not dark pink, mind you. Light baby girl pink. I teach kids that all colors are for boys and girls, but this, this is ridiculous. He looks like a gumball for fuck's sake. Know why he's doing it? Some badass from New York enrolled in the school last month. His first day of school he wore a black jersey with pink peeking out from under the sleeves. The very kid that looks like a walking ad for Tampax? Punched that kid last month. Explain that one to me.
There's good kids, too. But they're not any fun to talk about! I watch these kids and wonder if I was like that in 8th grade and I know I wasn't. I ga RON tee you I was a 100% dork. I was 11, we know that. I was small for my size. We know that. I didn't have any boobs. We know that, too. What y'all did not know was that Momma talked me into chopping my hair off and perming it. I had pubic hair. On my head. Only. The rest of me had not been exposed to the joys of puberty. To stop it from frizzing out in the sticky summer humidity that is Hong Kong in August, I gelled it down. Rather, I just got out of the shower and stuck so much gel in it that it maintained that wet look and didn't budge. If there was a typhoon coming, I was damn sure gonna look like I ALREADY had a helmet on my head. Looking back on pictures from that day, I'd like to dig a hole. Those are some pictures I will NEVER being showing DH OR anyone. One of the first boys I kissed? He saw that picture. It was in my yearbook. He asked to sign it, and despite how I fought, he said he wouldn't laugh. I got the *erm, um....BWAHAHAHAHA* He was too polite to say that if he had known that I looked like that at the beginning of the year he never would've kissed me, but he's British. They're all reserved like that anyway.
That's why I think people have kids, so they can let them walk out the door each morning and get a good belly aching laugh. I know that's what I'm going to do when Corona hits five. "Here baby girl, wear this. I swear it won't cause you any long lasting shame." I'll be a great mom.
Kids are coming. Think pink.
Shit, WHO DIDNT look bad at 11. Ok well Joell F didn't and Amber C and ok I can name a bunch more. I however looked like a freaking Long Legged Gimpy freak. NO I wont show you pics
AND NO Gary wont either. Thanks.
I was like that in 8th grade. I was horrible. =D Of course, when I got to High School I was a nice young man... Except for the time I made all the computers "sign on" screen say, "I like big juicy C**k." ... But that was a long time ago, wasn't it? (Shush, Rachel).
Maybe some time i'll get around to telling some of the stories of things I did in 8th grade and you can feel better about only being dry humped. ... Which I have to say, if I saw, I would still laugh at. =D Haha. I mean come on, I laughed when I read it.
R,
I can also name several girls that didn't look bad at eleven. I think they ate lots of chicken. Damn Bitches. Momma promised me they would age quickly and look bad by the time they hit 20. I'm holding on to that promise! :)
G,
I've got your "nice young man" right here! I seem to recall some stories about you! Aren't you the slick willy? :)
Although, your comment did make me think about some of the other kids in 8th grade with me, and I agree that this was pretty tame. Does not mean I didn't wnat to stick my mechanical pencil up this kid's nose and drag him to his Momma by his nostril, though. Yes. I spend my time in my room actively thinking of way to torture these horny little bastards.
Speaking of mechanical pencils and 8th grade boys. My boyfriend tells me that when he was that age, he jabbed his pencil into his friend's knee. Yes, the lead broke off, lodged there, and is still there today. Yes, he somehow managed to get his friend/victim in trouble while he got off scot-free.
I am just so happy I went to an all-girl's school and didn't have to experience any of that.
Gary was a shit in school. I went to a private Baptist school. I caused as much trouble as one thinks they can in that environment. Gary takes the cake though.
maybe the boy with the all pink outfit's mother left a red shirt with the whites. i've done that. i've had an entire load of white underwear turn pink on me. :)
I have some lead in my hand that I got stuck there in 6th grade, can't really see it right now, though, my hands are dry and dirty.
Hey, I was horrible 1st grade Elementary all the way through 2nd year in College, in my 2nd Semester I got away, so now My wife's cousin, Franky didn't have a good childhood either, having born with Kidney malfunctioning, he grew up a frail and skinny kid. Now, 35-years of age, he's facing one of life's greatest test, to hold the courage to undergo a Kidney Transplant.
Franky needs much cristian and spirtitual support. He's a awaiting a kidney transplant with his mother, Tita, in Tampa, FL.
I myself have endured a very troubled and test filled life. My father taught me the courage I currently have. Having born with Omphalocele (all intestines out my abdomen, as well as Goldenhar's syndrome, absent left ear and Hemifacial Microtia) I now have increased my COURAGE to withstand a very muscle debilitating disorder, or Fibromyalgia.
Enough about me, I'm writing on behalf of Franky whom I know for over 10 years. He's a tremendous young man with a noble heart the size of Manhattan, yet he's very sick and needs our help. We're not asking for money, however he still needs some help, such as volunteer translators (English-Spanish) and local transportation to and from his Medical clinics.
Franky will have a test done in the coming days to see if the organs surrounding his kidney aren't cancer infected too, otherwise he will be eliminated from the waiting list and sent back to his home in San Juan, Puerto Rico.
I would gladly thank you if you can coordinate visits to Franky's home south of Tampa General Hospital.
prgifts@zonai.com
(787)-792-9882
(787)-597-7613
Gus Cuevas