Is some nights before Christmas
And all thru the lands,
Saggy Booby Christmas Lights hang rampant
Like neglected swollen glands.
Oh the creatures are stirring
for they are quite irate,
They know sooner or later
They'll end up on my plate.
WARNING! Christmas package teaser! Wind up and watch-em-go sushi! If that's not enough to make you sign up, well... well... go away. Unless of course, you don't want something from me from Japan, and then c'mon in! Take off yer shoes and stay awhile!
And me looking squirrely,
And dh in his cap,
Sorry, he is not part of the Christmas package. He does have two brothers, though.
Are both settled in for the winter cold snap.
For we will be Christmas-ing neither here,
Nor there;
We couldn't get time off, not a day, not an hou air!
(For those of you that are not familiar with my french accent, pretend I am that chef guy from 'The Little Mermaid'. Or Beeker. Whichever floats your boat.)
So here we will sit on the day Jesus was (supposedly) born
Reading the Hustler and watching some porn.
So if you see this guy flying by I ask you to not let him linger
Send him over with dh's boss so I can give him the finger
If you will indulge us in this little favor
I won't write poetry again. Not E-VER.
(For you Hooked on Phonix-ers? Phonetically speaking, "A-VOR.")
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
And I would respectfully and humbly like to point out to those who are easily offended that the GIRL'S BUTT? IT'S. NOT. SHOWING.
AMEN.