When I was a spring chicken, I used to go to school with this kid named Vinnie Battiato. (shhh! He was Italian.) Vinnie, my darling neighbor, taught me a number of useful things. He taught me how to play darts (he would play left handed and chug a beer from the keg in his living room in between turns) , he taught me how to juggle women (he would play left handed and chug a beer from the keg in his living room in between turns) , and he taught me how to rate chicks. While I eventually realized that I SUCK and WILL! ALWAYS! SUCK! at playing darts, and that I did not have the *ahem* cojones to be a female that pursues and juggles other females, I did find Vinnie's chick rating system amusing, useful, and at times dead on.
TANGENT: Oh my, how I have aged. Dh worked with this kid, who I'll just call JB, but would more appropriately be referred to as BJ, who rated chicks. Constantly. This infuriated me. The kid was such a jackass that his breathing infuriated me. "How dare he think he is so above us all that he can rate chicks! What makes him think he can do that?!" I'd snort, disgusted, taking the nauseatingly holier than thou route, because, you know, I don't judge people, and I am so vehement about it, that I JUDGE PEOPLE THAT JUDGE PEOPLE. Hypocrisy? With a side of bitchy? I'll have some of that, please. Better make it a double. Yeah, but Vinnie and his buddies could rate chicks all day long, and I'd just laugh.
Vinnie and Co. used two numbers, and in retrospect, I think that was best. Trying to recall a complicated series of those squiggly things while at XYZ Bar's Drink or Drown (free beer! until somebody pees! Tres Chic!) would not have suited them. Yup, two numbers it was.
If a chick was HAWT, as in Hotty Bumbalotti, then she was a 2 - 10 (Don't be a dork. Friends don't let friends say "TWO DASH TEN." It's just "Two Ten") Meaning that even from two inches, the girl is still a 10. Then there was the less fortunate, 10-10. Meaning that the girl was a 10 from 10 feet, but once you got close, she was, ummm...how to put nicely? Not a 2-10. How they got close enough to any of these girls to determine where they placed on the scale is beyond me (I guess when you live next door to a bunch of guys, the element of mystery is completely LOST, woefully) , but I did find this handy little scale useful. For EVERYTHING.
Fast Forward Four or Ten Years. Synonymous with last night. Dh and I made a hot date to go to dinner. We happened upon a cute little restaurant, and thought it most fortuitous. The restaurant was packed and cozily rambunctious, the smell was intoxicating, and the menu was exquisite. Barely containing our excitement, we selected 5 of our favorite dishes and waited gleefully, stomachs rumbling. As they place dish after dish on our table, I could barely stop myself from jumping on the table and hording all the food for myself (What? Jumping on the table and staking my claim would've been perfectly in tune with my cavewoman Japanese! "FOOD! HUNGRY! BRING! PLEASE! NOW!" I can't imagine anything more appropriate.) . Well, most of it, anway. Our spread was indeed a sight to behold.
YET ANOTHER ASIDE. Far be it from me to admit ignorance, but does anybody out there know how to make the picture smaller so I can put it on here? I tried a JPEG cruncher (no, I don't know if that's the right thing to do) , but to no avail. And I took a picture! For you!
Until I am enlightened, however, y'all will just have to settle for the MENU from self proclaimed Japanese casual style restaurant. Interesting, to say the least. And disappointly a 10-10. The squid was squidless. The edamame was edamameless. The sashimi, slimy, which is never a good thing. But it LOOKED! SO! DELICIOUS! I was so disappointed that I almost cried. The only good thing? The coke. I haven't been in a restaurant where food looked so good and tasted so blah since China, at a pizza place. But that's a tangent and a story for another day.
Nagomi Tei Restaurant? I solemnly declare you: 10-10.
That's one of the worst things in the world - when good food is actually bad. I feel for you from the bottom of my heart (or is that stomach?)
I found Malaysia like that - the food looked like typical "Chineese food" in an American mall restaurant - but usually tasted like old fish in a jogging shoe! BTW Adobe Photoshop works best to shrink a picture, but it's expensive. Have a Merry Christmas!
Such a shame that food that good looking is a 10-10! How I miss real Japanese food...takoyaki, okonomiyaki, katsudon, etc....
My friends and I had a slightly more complex three-tiered system when we were younger. Yes, no, or maybe.
Yes = yes, I would have sex with her and openly admit it, possibly even proclaim it as a source of pride... roughly equivalent to your 2-10.
No = yes, I would have sex with her but not openly admit it and further would go to the grave denying the event ever took place no matter what evidence was presented... roughly the 10-10 you described.
Maybe = yes, I would have sex with her and maybe cut my penis off afterwards because I could obviously not be trusted with it... roughly equivalent to a 5280-female (looks vaguely like a woman from a mile away).
We were not picky teenagers.