I suppose I should justify the "Man JEALOUS. CLAIM PROPERTY" remark I made below. Did I mean to insinuate that Dave was a cave man? Oh, absolutely...NOT. Sadly, he was fairly educated - but still an ass. I laugh everyday that I am waking up to dh and not to him.
However, I do have further discourse (Yeah, right! It's something am in the morning, gimme a break. Yes, I'll take that in KitKat bars, if I must) about the claiming of property. Well, it's just a story. From school. Stop here before I get labeled a "Teacher BLOG" which is worse than a "Mommy Blog", because they're not even my kids (and I thank the good lord for that every day. profusely. MY kids won't act like that. No, I don't really believe that. I just like to say it.) .
Walking back from class, a little boy grabbed my hand. In 2nd grade, holding the teacher's hand, especially a teacher of the opposite sex, is NOT COOL. After all, I am a GIRL. EWWWWW. The other little boys were very conscious of this and laughed and giggled all the way back to the classroom, pointing and gesturing and making a general ruckus about it. The little boy in question turns around, looks them squarely in the eyes and says loudly, "MY WOMAN."
Well shit. I was so shocked that I just stared at the kid, highly amused. And kind of horrified. Last time somebody tried to claim me, well...how come it is funnier when small people do it? Like Mini Me getting tanked on VH1? When he fell over I said, "Look! Like a little doll!" But I would've done more than just carry him to bed. I would've undressed him and put the BEST clothes on him, and covered him up so he didn't get cold. And when he started moaning, Yeah, I'll stop here, because this is mighty un PC of me, and it's getting kind of sick in a stalkerish way.
Then I said, "I am NOT your WOMAN, I am your TEACHER," as sternly as I could muster up.
Apparently, once you own someone, you don't have to listen to them, because he looked at me, looked at the boys, held our entwined fingers up and stated, in a much louder voice, "MY! WOMAN!"