April 06, 2005
Arsenio, Arsenio, Wherefore Art Thou?

A couple days ago, overcome with emotion at the rolling of my 3rd YAHTZEE! (Yes, I know I need to get out more, people. You're not the only one who finds that painfully obvious.) and unfortunately far from the dishwasher meaning that I could not reenact my 'I've still got it!' hip thrust, I engaged in a little fist pump. You know how you do something and you know you just look ridiculous doing it? Bordering on epileptic? I had that moment. Frozen in time with dh's look of "What the hell was that, woman?", I vowed to never look ridiculous doing the fist pump again.

So I started practicing. Way too rhythmically and socially challenged to effect the fist pump remininscent of Mr. Hall, I just kept that damn thing at my side. I tried to be inconspicous, inserting one here or there nonchalantly, like when I made a basket into the trash or answered a question on Jeopardy. Happy occasions.

Apparently, I was not as smooth nor inconspicuous as I thought.

Dh: What are you doing? The fist pump? Again? AGAIN? You're doing it wrong.
TCWH: What do you mean I'm doing it wrong? How can I be doing it WRONG?
Dh: Well, if you do the palm down, fist clenched...
TCWH (interrupting, 'cuz I'm rude like that): ...It means you're schtupping the girl!
Dh: Yeah, and if you rotate your wrist a little, kind of like you've been doing...(allows his voice to trail off)
TCWH: I know what THAT means! I was NOT making the "jerkoff" motion!
Dh:It could be like a mating call. Of the young, teaching, upright, female.
TCWH: No more ANIMAL PLANET FOR YOU! If I'm so bad at it, how the HELL do you do it? Hunh? It's a fucking fist pump for fuck's sake! (insert 'roid rage here, misdirected anger, anyone?)
Dh: ::executes perfect fist pump::
TCWH: Bastard.
Dh: ::smug::

Maybe I'll move to Hawaii, where they just do the "Hang Loose."


Alex | 08:50 AM |

Comments

Just remember, your fist should be perpendicular to the floor when executing a fist pump. That's how Tiger Woods does it.

Here in Hawaii, we do the "shaka."

comment by marvo at 11:32 AM on 04.06.05 [ link ]

I'd be down with dat:)

comment by Becky at 11:43 AM on 04.06.05 [ link ]

The fist-pump as with all other sports celebrations, is located on the Y-Chromosome.

I don't blame you for not being able to do it right.

comment by Brian at 10:37 PM on 04.06.05 [ link ]

It's really more like a right handed person trying to throw a football left handed. It's not pretty!

comment by Surfcat at 12:21 AM on 04.07.05 [ link ]

Haaaaaaa. That was so funny.

Btw, where are pictures of the new hair?

comment by Gloria at 12:42 AM on 04.07.05 [ link ]
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