Today is the day in the middle of the week,
Of which all dare to dream but few to speak.
It's the day on which we all want to get a jump -
Wednesday is the day of hump.
On Mondays there is not much humping -
Primary on my list is not bone jumping.
With the rest of the mind numbing week ahead,
Like Jon Cusack, I'm BETTER OFF DEAD.
Neither is Tuesday a likely candidate
I feel more like slug, less like mate.
But come Wednesday? Yippee! Yahoo!
That's the day to DO the DO!
Would you do it in the east of Spain?
Indubitably so, with Mark Twain!
I would not be like Catherine, who showed no remorse
When she did it with a horse.
Of course, of course.
Would you do it at a party?
I would do it, on a bed of Smartees!
Would you do it on a train?
Of course I would, AGAIN and AGAIN!
Excuse me while I end this poem,
I've got some oats and need to sow'em
If you come over my door will say,
"CLOSED in Observance of HUMP DAY!"
P.S. Happy Birthday, Dr. Seuss!